How do I begin with this story?
Nothing matters when our world seems dark and hopeless. When we feel empty deep inside with no light at the end of the end of the tunnel, why do we live on?
Do you think that your life is miserable due your illnesses, situations and relationships? Although there are many things that happen due to no faults of your own, you have allowed the conditions to persist to some extend. Sad to say……….life sucks.
Before we deal with any problems regardless of depression, financial, environment, family and so on, we have to accept that we have a problem first and foremost, don’t you think so?
It is painful to read those messages from the sufferers of depression and other conditions because it conveys negative emotions and hopelessness. They are in a cave of emotional turbulence with little hope of getting out of it. They are either pessimistic or cautiously optimistic.
Is there a positive side to being depressed? In the history of mankind, we have seen many normal individuals who have turned their shortcomings into a fulfilling life that inspires the average Joe and Jones to live a better life than what it is now.
You must take control of your life. Is it not your life regardless of whether it sucks or not? Although depression is an illness of different factors, it is not the end of the world. As a human being, we have to live with different kind of conditions like pleasure and pain, fame and shame and approval and disapproval from others.
These living conditions affect everyone without any exceptions. So you might argue that you condition is different and no one understands it better than you. It is true that no one ever understands you deeply other than yourself. So live with that, can you? Consider yourself lucky if there is a few caring and compassionate persons out therewho really listen to you without judgement. Just remind ourselves that no one could truly understand what we have been going through.
Sure we want to feel connected to other people as a social creature. So your relationship is also vital to your mental health. When we think of ourselves and indulge in self-pity or self-criticism, do we ever think how hurtful our loved ones and friends might feel?
It is hurtful that we are trapped in the cycle of doom and gloom. Thus I understand that you are being pulled in the cave of darkness or being trapped in the cave that makes you feel hopeless with suicidal thoughts in the back of your minds.
This trap is a trap nonetheless and I would like to say that a trap has its weaknesses too. Imagine you have been told about the secret to escape from the cave that you have fallen into and it seems impossible to escape from it.
It is really dark in the cave and it is scary when all we could hear is some voices of helplessness. Did you come across the story of the young football team who got trapped in the cave in Thailand?
Firstly they did not ask for the catastrophe to happen as all they thought of was to explore the cave.
Secondly they remain optimistic although they were facing the risk of death either due to starvation, sicknesses or hypothermia.
Thirdly they encourage one another to stay positive in the face of the perilous danger.
Fourthly they wait for help because they could not get out on their own as the exit had been flooded.
Fifthly the rescuers came to their rescue.
Someone knew that they went into the cave and thus have informed the authorities to seek help. In certain situations in life, we have to seek help from others too. Nevertheless we must also understand the risk of getting trapped in the cave if we do not take precautionary steps on our own.
So there are times when we fall into a trap due to unforeseen circumstances. Then we must be willing to let others to help us in escaping the cave and then we must prevent the same thing from happening.
The boys were suffering in the cave and they have depleted their physical energy as days gone by. What they have left was their will to live. One boy thought of his favorite dish by his beloved mum who had been waiting for his safe escape. His little vision had pulled through.
In the face of death, he had a vision to live on. A vision can be anything like going for holiday somewhere, seeing your kids grow up and marry, live till old age, experience different cultures, read more books, try new things and so on.
In the period of darkness, you must keep the vision which is the light at the end of the tunnel. Without the vision to light up you up, the darkness shall persist with only death in sight. The monster of darkness has been disturbing you; extinguish it as if you are the Terminator.
Now you need the tools as the Terminator: from foods to therapies. I am a proponent of natural healing without medicines if you care to know. But please take your medicines as prescribed by a doctor.
If you already have the tools to fight the monster, are the tools working for the battle? Are the specific therapies working for you in particular? I would like to congratulate those who have been winning the battles. If you fall sometimes, pick yourself up again.
When someone is in a depressed state, there is a significant shift in the flow of mental energy away from the “positive emotional investment system” and into the “negative emotional investment system.” The positive emotional system is about being energized and open to new experiences, having a lot of curiosity and desires, and seeking and approaching “the good” (e.g., things that are emotionally nourishing like high-quality relationships, exploring interesting topics, and engaging in rewarding activities).
In contrast, the negative emotion system is about signaling danger and loss and avoiding and withdrawing into a defensive posture. Depression is a shift that pulls the positive emotion system down and jacks the negative emotion system up. Thus people who are depressed experience increases in negative feelings like sadness, discouragement, despair, anxiety, irritability, anger, shame, and guilt. In addition, they experience less energy for engagement, exploration, pleasure, happiness, and interest. Technically, this is called “anhedonia.”
Life is not as bleak as one experiences although that is what it appears to be. We all have to face all kind of challenges as human beings and I think that we are endowed with a fighting spirit in the face of it all.
As a creature that lives in an ever-changing conditions like climate change, economic cycle, changing jobs patterns, political upheavals, social unrests and many unknowns; how are we supposed to act in spite of the challenges?
External conditions like these affect us in one way of another: autonomous vehicles could replace commercial drivers; unemployments and semi-employment lead to social issues but it also forces us to re-engineer the way we manage the economy; higher frequency of big floods and forest fires; higher prices of foods; high inflations etc.
These phenomena sound very pessimistic and we are not denying its negative effects on untold number of human lives. It seems very depressive as well. In the face of the tough situations, remember that we have one special human endowment: the ability to choose our responses.
When we feel depressed, we could point to our reaction to a particular situation. Let’s say someone lose a job; it shall affect oneself economically; it could downgrade his status too. When one reacts to that situation, that is called stress. Your survival instinct could take over your life.
Thus it is very important to take charge of your life because you can always response to any situations. Obviously we only want pleasure and avoid pain. As we are affected by external conditions, we must also realise that internal conditions like that state of our mental and physical health would affect our well-beings too.
When it comes to illnesses, we have done a lot as human specie in treating many problems like diabetes, cancer, heart ailments, stroke, skin conditions, kidney failures and a host of other mental disorders.
Life could be very depressed as we have been reacting to every single threat internally and externally. So if we were to look at any potential threat as a cost we pay to live in this world, then are we not willing to pay the price then?
We could tackle almost any issues if we act proactively in dealing with them. So when you are in the darkness of the cave of depression, you hate the ‘cost’ of dealing with the difficulties and you have inadvertently being pulled into a depressive mood.
Nevertheless you are not yet ready or aware of the ‘price’ of overcoming that scenario. Before you think that this author is talking about economy or price of treatments, give him the chance to clarify further.
The ‘cost’ is the stress that we feel and the ‘price” is what we are willing to do to act upon something. Taking actions alleviate our stress because you are being proactive when you decide to take any appropriate action that could heal yourself emotionally, physically, economically, mentally and spiritually.
The ‘cost’ of stress is not going to disappear because our lives are centred on survival and our natural instinct could take over the better parts of our lives.
How many of us are willing to pay the prices of living the life that we want rather than immerse in the cost of life? This is also the art of living; everyone faces the cost of something but not everyone is willing to pay the price of the things.
Let’s take the example of obesity: the cost of sedentary life is overweight and obesity but the price to overcome the issue is discipline of managing calories intake and workout regimes. A study has shown that obese people are prone to depression too.
So when we are facing the ‘cost’, we have to think about the ‘price’ that we may not yet be willing to pay in dealing with the issues.
When we are boiled down in the ‘cost’ of depression, we must take actions which is paying the ‘price’ which is higher than the ‘cost’. That means we have to exert efforts in overcoming the gap between those two variables.
Is life ever been smooth sailing for anyone? Yes we do not discount the fact that we have differences in many aspects of life from cultural backgrounds to economic status. Yet we all suffer one way or another.
It is my belief that we must overcome the problems which are opportunities in disguise. We are presented with many opportunities in life simply because we are endowed with the responsibility: the ability too response. We have been asking about the purpose of life. Perhaps our species are designed to have those responsibilities to deal with any challenges. Perhaps that is the purpose of being alive in that we are evolving as a specie where the future is acted upon in the present moments.
I would to affirm everyone whether they are rich, poor, depressed, sad, smart, refugee, grumpy, parents, teens, professionals, blue workers, volunteers, politicians, economists, accountants, doctors, youngsters etc. that they have the endowment of the responsibilities.